Reevaluating evaluationsSimulating productivityHacking into the mainframeCultivating trivial small talkCompounding omelette without breaking eggsCensoring political correctnessCalibrating problem solvingProcrastinating coffee breaksIgnoring limitationsAnalyzing previous messageGenerating unnecessary informationAvoiding elaborate mistakesFabricating Russian conspiracyCloning imperfectionsBuffering cursing computerPixelating lossless vectorsDeconstructing rubix cubeRemoving crippling doubtsDepixelating realitySpilling vital coffeeDownloading RAMBeing politically incorrectContemplating takeaway orderEnabling voluntary overtimeNormalizing objective absurditiesForgetting to remember to forgetDecrypting vague guidelinesAligning crooked edgesSeizing the memes of productionFactoring in lazinessFocusing on indistinct detailsExposing imperfectionsStitching vertical panoramasWhitening teethDestabilizing office chairExcessive head scratchingOptimistic ceiling staringFinding new ideas under the sunImplementing loose disciplineAttempting to turning off and on againCompressing superficial workflowShadilayingChanging coffee filtersImporting stale RAW filesReanimating deadlinesEnhancing subjective beautyRestarting modemSaving lost progressAttempting theoretical creativity