Enabling voluntary overtimeProcrastinating coffee breaksIgnoring limitationsFocusing on indistinct detailsFinding new ideas under the sunSpilling vital coffeeAttempting theoretical creativityCompressing superficial workflowReevaluating evaluationsShadilayingChanging coffee filtersBuffering cursing computerAvoiding elaborate mistakesCultivating trivial small talkForgetting to remember to forgetContemplating takeaway orderSimulating productivityDecrypting vague guidelinesRestarting modemAttempting to turning off and on againImporting stale RAW filesSaving lost progressStitching vertical panoramasDepixelating realityFabricating Russian conspiracyAligning crooked edgesCompounding omelette without breaking eggsCensoring political correctnessBeing politically incorrectHacking into the mainframeExcessive head scratchingDeconstructing rubix cubeAnalyzing previous messageDestabilizing office chairImplementing loose disciplineRemoving crippling doubtsCloning imperfectionsNormalizing objective absurditiesReanimating deadlinesWhitening teethOptimistic ceiling staringSeizing the memes of productionFactoring in lazinessCalibrating problem solvingEnhancing subjective beautyPixelating lossless vectorsGenerating unnecessary informationExposing imperfectionsDownloading RAM