Destabilizing office chairReanimating deadlinesAttempting theoretical creativityImplementing loose disciplineAttempting to turning off and on againCompressing superficial workflowCalibrating problem solvingPixelating lossless vectorsAnalyzing previous messageSaving lost progressDecrypting vague guidelinesStitching vertical panoramasCensoring political correctnessSpilling vital coffeeSimulating productivityExposing imperfectionsCloning imperfectionsOptimistic ceiling staringReevaluating evaluationsRemoving crippling doubtsHacking into the mainframeRestarting modemProcrastinating coffee breaksDeconstructing rubix cubeImporting stale RAW filesCultivating trivial small talkShadilayingEnhancing subjective beautyAvoiding elaborate mistakesFabricating Russian conspiracyAligning crooked edgesFocusing on indistinct detailsExcessive head scratchingNormalizing objective absurditiesCompounding omelette without breaking eggsEnabling voluntary overtimeDepixelating realityFactoring in lazinessChanging coffee filtersGenerating unnecessary informationDownloading RAMIgnoring limitationsBeing politically incorrectBuffering cursing computerContemplating takeaway orderWhitening teethForgetting to remember to forgetSeizing the memes of productionFinding new ideas under the sun