Restarting modemCompressing superficial workflowForgetting to remember to forgetSpilling vital coffeeFocusing on indistinct detailsAligning crooked edgesDownloading RAMStitching vertical panoramasDestabilizing office chairCompounding omelette without breaking eggsBeing politically incorrectAttempting theoretical creativityReanimating deadlinesDecrypting vague guidelinesProcrastinating coffee breaksImporting stale RAW filesIgnoring limitationsDeconstructing rubix cubeChanging coffee filtersWhitening teethCalibrating problem solvingShadilayingFinding new ideas under the sunHacking into the mainframeGenerating unnecessary informationImplementing loose disciplineContemplating takeaway orderCloning imperfectionsSimulating productivitySaving lost progressPixelating lossless vectorsExposing imperfectionsCensoring political correctnessBuffering cursing computerSeizing the memes of productionCultivating trivial small talkExcessive head scratchingEnabling voluntary overtimeReevaluating evaluationsNormalizing objective absurditiesAvoiding elaborate mistakesDepixelating realityAnalyzing previous messageFactoring in lazinessEnhancing subjective beautyFabricating Russian conspiracyRemoving crippling doubtsAttempting to turning off and on againOptimistic ceiling staring