Cultivating trivial small talkDownloading RAMReevaluating evaluationsFabricating Russian conspiracyDestabilizing office chairDecrypting vague guidelinesNormalizing objective absurditiesForgetting to remember to forgetSpilling vital coffeeSimulating productivityBeing politically incorrectChanging coffee filtersGenerating unnecessary informationShadilayingContemplating takeaway orderSeizing the memes of productionCompounding omelette without breaking eggsFocusing on indistinct detailsAnalyzing previous messageExcessive head scratchingEnhancing subjective beautyWhitening teethPixelating lossless vectorsAttempting to turning off and on againDeconstructing rubix cubeEnabling voluntary overtimeOptimistic ceiling staringStitching vertical panoramasAttempting theoretical creativityRemoving crippling doubtsFinding new ideas under the sunFactoring in lazinessIgnoring limitationsImplementing loose disciplineCalibrating problem solvingCloning imperfectionsHacking into the mainframeExposing imperfectionsProcrastinating coffee breaksSaving lost progressDepixelating realityCompressing superficial workflowCensoring political correctnessAvoiding elaborate mistakesBuffering cursing computerImporting stale RAW filesAligning crooked edgesReanimating deadlinesRestarting modem