Generating unnecessary informationWhitening teethCultivating trivial small talkSaving lost progressCloning imperfectionsAttempting theoretical creativityIgnoring limitationsRemoving crippling doubtsExposing imperfectionsChanging coffee filtersFabricating Russian conspiracyExcessive head scratchingHacking into the mainframeEnabling voluntary overtimeProcrastinating coffee breaksReevaluating evaluationsNormalizing objective absurditiesDecrypting vague guidelinesShadilayingDownloading RAMSeizing the memes of productionBuffering cursing computerSpilling vital coffeeSimulating productivityStitching vertical panoramasEnhancing subjective beautyImporting stale RAW filesImplementing loose disciplineFinding new ideas under the sunDeconstructing rubix cubeCompounding omelette without breaking eggsAnalyzing previous messageReanimating deadlinesDepixelating realityFactoring in lazinessAvoiding elaborate mistakesDestabilizing office chairCensoring political correctnessOptimistic ceiling staringForgetting to remember to forgetAligning crooked edgesFocusing on indistinct detailsAttempting to turning off and on againRestarting modemCalibrating problem solvingPixelating lossless vectorsContemplating takeaway orderCompressing superficial workflowBeing politically incorrect