Calibrating problem solvingCultivating trivial small talkSimulating productivityShadilayingAvoiding elaborate mistakesSeizing the memes of productionCompressing superficial workflowExcessive head scratchingForgetting to remember to forgetRemoving crippling doubtsReanimating deadlinesAttempting to turning off and on againCensoring political correctnessDownloading RAMDepixelating realitySpilling vital coffeeChanging coffee filtersIgnoring limitationsCloning imperfectionsProcrastinating coffee breaksAttempting theoretical creativityGenerating unnecessary informationDestabilizing office chairStitching vertical panoramasContemplating takeaway orderReevaluating evaluationsHacking into the mainframeNormalizing objective absurditiesCompounding omelette without breaking eggsImporting stale RAW filesEnabling voluntary overtimeBeing politically incorrectPixelating lossless vectorsFactoring in lazinessEnhancing subjective beautyExposing imperfectionsFabricating Russian conspiracyImplementing loose disciplineDecrypting vague guidelinesFocusing on indistinct detailsWhitening teethFinding new ideas under the sunSaving lost progressBuffering cursing computerAligning crooked edgesDeconstructing rubix cubeOptimistic ceiling staringAnalyzing previous messageRestarting modem