Avoiding elaborate mistakesEnabling voluntary overtimeEnhancing subjective beautyFocusing on indistinct detailsCultivating trivial small talkHacking into the mainframeGenerating unnecessary informationStitching vertical panoramasSeizing the memes of productionCensoring political correctnessShadilayingAligning crooked edgesDecrypting vague guidelinesBeing politically incorrectProcrastinating coffee breaksAttempting theoretical creativityChanging coffee filtersReevaluating evaluationsExcessive head scratchingSimulating productivityContemplating takeaway orderAnalyzing previous messageIgnoring limitationsFabricating Russian conspiracyRemoving crippling doubtsCompressing superficial workflowPixelating lossless vectorsForgetting to remember to forgetImporting stale RAW filesDepixelating realityCalibrating problem solvingExposing imperfectionsDeconstructing rubix cubeSaving lost progressAttempting to turning off and on againDestabilizing office chairImplementing loose disciplineOptimistic ceiling staringRestarting modemBuffering cursing computerDownloading RAMFactoring in lazinessNormalizing objective absurditiesCompounding omelette without breaking eggsReanimating deadlinesCloning imperfectionsWhitening teethFinding new ideas under the sunSpilling vital coffee