Decrypting vague guidelinesProcrastinating coffee breaksBuffering cursing computerAvoiding elaborate mistakesFocusing on indistinct detailsForgetting to remember to forgetImplementing loose disciplineSeizing the memes of productionDeconstructing rubix cubeFabricating Russian conspiracyFinding new ideas under the sunRemoving crippling doubtsHacking into the mainframeExposing imperfectionsDepixelating realityAttempting to turning off and on againNormalizing objective absurditiesDownloading RAMIgnoring limitationsAligning crooked edgesExcessive head scratchingCalibrating problem solvingFactoring in lazinessWhitening teethCensoring political correctnessContemplating takeaway orderAnalyzing previous messageReanimating deadlinesCloning imperfectionsRestarting modemChanging coffee filtersImporting stale RAW filesGenerating unnecessary informationAttempting theoretical creativityCompressing superficial workflowCompounding omelette without breaking eggsSimulating productivityReevaluating evaluationsEnhancing subjective beautyPixelating lossless vectorsStitching vertical panoramasBeing politically incorrectCultivating trivial small talkOptimistic ceiling staringSpilling vital coffeeEnabling voluntary overtimeSaving lost progressDestabilizing office chairShadilaying