Depixelating realityCompressing superficial workflowAttempting theoretical creativityBuffering cursing computerDestabilizing office chairNormalizing objective absurditiesAnalyzing previous messageWhitening teethSimulating productivityShadilayingChanging coffee filtersAligning crooked edgesFinding new ideas under the sunExcessive head scratchingIgnoring limitationsSeizing the memes of productionImporting stale RAW filesPixelating lossless vectorsFocusing on indistinct detailsEnabling voluntary overtimeCompounding omelette without breaking eggsImplementing loose disciplineCensoring political correctnessRestarting modemGenerating unnecessary informationProcrastinating coffee breaksReevaluating evaluationsDownloading RAMDeconstructing rubix cubeSpilling vital coffeeEnhancing subjective beautyCalibrating problem solvingSaving lost progressDecrypting vague guidelinesCultivating trivial small talkRemoving crippling doubtsAvoiding elaborate mistakesCloning imperfectionsBeing politically incorrectStitching vertical panoramasHacking into the mainframeOptimistic ceiling staringAttempting to turning off and on againFactoring in lazinessReanimating deadlinesForgetting to remember to forgetContemplating takeaway orderFabricating Russian conspiracyExposing imperfections