Simulating productivityWhitening teethFabricating Russian conspiracyCensoring political correctnessPixelating lossless vectorsBeing politically incorrectOptimistic ceiling staringRestarting modemReevaluating evaluationsBuffering cursing computerCalibrating problem solvingHacking into the mainframeEnhancing subjective beautyAligning crooked edgesFocusing on indistinct detailsSeizing the memes of productionDeconstructing rubix cubeSaving lost progressAvoiding elaborate mistakesAnalyzing previous messageShadilayingProcrastinating coffee breaksEnabling voluntary overtimeAttempting to turning off and on againRemoving crippling doubtsCompressing superficial workflowExposing imperfectionsDecrypting vague guidelinesImplementing loose disciplineForgetting to remember to forgetGenerating unnecessary informationStitching vertical panoramasChanging coffee filtersExcessive head scratchingContemplating takeaway orderSpilling vital coffeeDownloading RAMFactoring in lazinessFinding new ideas under the sunAttempting theoretical creativityIgnoring limitationsCompounding omelette without breaking eggsNormalizing objective absurditiesImporting stale RAW filesReanimating deadlinesCultivating trivial small talkCloning imperfectionsDestabilizing office chairDepixelating reality