Simulating productivityDestabilizing office chairNormalizing objective absurditiesImporting stale RAW filesSaving lost progressReanimating deadlinesStitching vertical panoramasEnhancing subjective beautyReevaluating evaluationsChanging coffee filtersAttempting theoretical creativityFocusing on indistinct detailsCalibrating problem solvingFactoring in lazinessCompounding omelette without breaking eggsBeing politically incorrectIgnoring limitationsEnabling voluntary overtimeCensoring political correctnessSeizing the memes of productionDecrypting vague guidelinesContemplating takeaway orderFabricating Russian conspiracySpilling vital coffeeAttempting to turning off and on againDepixelating realityGenerating unnecessary informationFinding new ideas under the sunDownloading RAMDeconstructing rubix cubeExposing imperfectionsAnalyzing previous messageForgetting to remember to forgetImplementing loose disciplineAvoiding elaborate mistakesHacking into the mainframeBuffering cursing computerOptimistic ceiling staringRemoving crippling doubtsRestarting modemShadilayingPixelating lossless vectorsProcrastinating coffee breaksExcessive head scratchingCompressing superficial workflowAligning crooked edgesCloning imperfectionsCultivating trivial small talkWhitening teeth