Compounding omelette without breaking eggsForgetting to remember to forgetSeizing the memes of productionFinding new ideas under the sunAttempting theoretical creativityFabricating Russian conspiracyStitching vertical panoramasProcrastinating coffee breaksOptimistic ceiling staringWhitening teethSimulating productivityRemoving crippling doubtsCompressing superficial workflowCultivating trivial small talkNormalizing objective absurditiesCloning imperfectionsShadilayingExposing imperfectionsHacking into the mainframeExcessive head scratchingEnabling voluntary overtimeSpilling vital coffeeImplementing loose disciplineAvoiding elaborate mistakesEnhancing subjective beautyDownloading RAMCalibrating problem solvingReanimating deadlinesGenerating unnecessary informationBuffering cursing computerRestarting modemFocusing on indistinct detailsAligning crooked edgesContemplating takeaway orderAnalyzing previous messageAttempting to turning off and on againChanging coffee filtersDepixelating realityCensoring political correctnessIgnoring limitationsBeing politically incorrectDecrypting vague guidelinesImporting stale RAW filesReevaluating evaluationsFactoring in lazinessDeconstructing rubix cubeSaving lost progressDestabilizing office chairPixelating lossless vectors