Spilling vital coffeeBeing politically incorrectNormalizing objective absurditiesEnabling voluntary overtimeExposing imperfectionsFabricating Russian conspiracyProcrastinating coffee breaksExcessive head scratchingDecrypting vague guidelinesDepixelating realityAvoiding elaborate mistakesForgetting to remember to forgetFactoring in lazinessFinding new ideas under the sunDeconstructing rubix cubePixelating lossless vectorsWhitening teethAttempting theoretical creativityAnalyzing previous messageCultivating trivial small talkIgnoring limitationsDestabilizing office chairOptimistic ceiling staringGenerating unnecessary informationShadilayingCompounding omelette without breaking eggsCompressing superficial workflowAligning crooked edgesSeizing the memes of productionFocusing on indistinct detailsSaving lost progressCensoring political correctnessSimulating productivityCalibrating problem solvingBuffering cursing computerReanimating deadlinesStitching vertical panoramasChanging coffee filtersCloning imperfectionsRestarting modemAttempting to turning off and on againRemoving crippling doubtsEnhancing subjective beautyImporting stale RAW filesDownloading RAMImplementing loose disciplineContemplating takeaway orderHacking into the mainframeReevaluating evaluations