Reanimating deadlinesFocusing on indistinct detailsSimulating productivityImplementing loose disciplineDeconstructing rubix cubeAvoiding elaborate mistakesBeing politically incorrectIgnoring limitationsCalibrating problem solvingEnabling voluntary overtimeFabricating Russian conspiracyImporting stale RAW filesFinding new ideas under the sunBuffering cursing computerPixelating lossless vectorsAttempting theoretical creativityFactoring in lazinessSpilling vital coffeeCensoring political correctnessAligning crooked edgesDestabilizing office chairHacking into the mainframeChanging coffee filtersShadilayingRestarting modemAnalyzing previous messageAttempting to turning off and on againCultivating trivial small talkCompressing superficial workflowNormalizing objective absurditiesSeizing the memes of productionDecrypting vague guidelinesStitching vertical panoramasOptimistic ceiling staringExposing imperfectionsDownloading RAMWhitening teethReevaluating evaluationsGenerating unnecessary informationContemplating takeaway orderProcrastinating coffee breaksCloning imperfectionsRemoving crippling doubtsExcessive head scratchingDepixelating realityForgetting to remember to forgetCompounding omelette without breaking eggsEnhancing subjective beautySaving lost progress