Avoiding elaborate mistakesReanimating deadlinesProcrastinating coffee breaksCensoring political correctnessDecrypting vague guidelinesDestabilizing office chairOptimistic ceiling staringRestarting modemFactoring in lazinessExcessive head scratchingChanging coffee filtersAttempting theoretical creativityEnhancing subjective beautyCloning imperfectionsDownloading RAMSeizing the memes of productionBeing politically incorrectFabricating Russian conspiracySpilling vital coffeeAnalyzing previous messageReevaluating evaluationsAligning crooked edgesShadilayingSimulating productivityCompressing superficial workflowFocusing on indistinct detailsWhitening teethDepixelating realityPixelating lossless vectorsGenerating unnecessary informationBuffering cursing computerCultivating trivial small talkCalibrating problem solvingHacking into the mainframeCompounding omelette without breaking eggsForgetting to remember to forgetDeconstructing rubix cubeExposing imperfectionsSaving lost progressImporting stale RAW filesNormalizing objective absurditiesFinding new ideas under the sunImplementing loose disciplineContemplating takeaway orderStitching vertical panoramasIgnoring limitationsRemoving crippling doubtsAttempting to turning off and on againEnabling voluntary overtime