Simulating productivityWhitening teethIgnoring limitationsAttempting theoretical creativityNormalizing objective absurditiesBuffering cursing computerOptimistic ceiling staringAvoiding elaborate mistakesEnabling voluntary overtimeProcrastinating coffee breaksShadilayingAnalyzing previous messageDestabilizing office chairPixelating lossless vectorsImporting stale RAW filesCloning imperfectionsDownloading RAMHacking into the mainframeCensoring political correctnessFabricating Russian conspiracyBeing politically incorrectStitching vertical panoramasExposing imperfectionsImplementing loose disciplineCultivating trivial small talkReevaluating evaluationsCompounding omelette without breaking eggsFocusing on indistinct detailsSpilling vital coffeeAttempting to turning off and on againRemoving crippling doubtsCompressing superficial workflowContemplating takeaway orderSaving lost progressSeizing the memes of productionRestarting modemEnhancing subjective beautyAligning crooked edgesDeconstructing rubix cubeExcessive head scratchingCalibrating problem solvingDepixelating realityChanging coffee filtersFactoring in lazinessGenerating unnecessary informationForgetting to remember to forgetReanimating deadlinesFinding new ideas under the sunDecrypting vague guidelines